No One Sits Alone: How to Make Sure Your Teen Finds Friends in High School

While you might encourage your teen to have a conversation starter in their back pocket for their first day, you’ll want to make sure they’re in the right environment to begin with. Look for a school that purposefully sets new students up for success and encourages positive teen friendships every day with best practices like these: 

• New student orientations: One way to ease anxiety about your teen’s first day is to get them acclimated to school before it starts. New students should be introduced to staff, principals, counselors, student government representatives, student activities coordinators, and others on campus. During orientation, they can review their schedule and practice walking to their classes as they learn their way around campus and meet their teachers.
• 1-to-1 peer pairings: New high schoolers should be matched up with another student in the same grade with similar interests who can help them acclimate. For example, a baseball player may be paired with another baseball player, while a student interested in drama may be paired with a performing arts student. There may also be programs over the summer where new students can get to know others before school starts, such as through athletic conditioning programs. 
• Small groups: Look for a school that creates a purposeful environment to foster friendships. For example, at Southwest Florida Christian Academy (SFCA), high schoolers are paired into small groups, known as Impact groups, of 12-15 teens. These students are divided by gender and age and led by a dedicated teacher. The groups remain together throughout all four years of high school, allowing strong connections to form.
• Individual mentors: In addition, a relational culture should be innate in the high school you’re considering. Your child should have the opportunity to have a go-to mentor they can trust, whether a coach, teacher, school office staff member, or another adult on campus. 
• Counselor check-ins: You’ll want to look for an environment where everyone goes the extra mile, including school counselors, who make it a point to check in with new students frequently at the start of school and continue to check in with them throughout the academic year. 

Teachers who care: Beyond the classrooms, a school culture that encourages friendships will have teachers and faculty who have lunch in the cafeteria with students, have a pulse on the student body, and are around to make sure no one is sitting alone. They’ll notice if a student is in need of a listening ear or an encouraging word.